Hello writers!
What does success feel like to you? I’m not talking about external measurements of success, but how it feels in your body and heart. Do you feel lighter? Does the air feel alive? Do you just feel happy?
What I want to talk to you about today is celebrating the small successes.
NaNo is a joyous journey and it gives us a goal to strive for. Goals are great. But showing up is the success. I’ve been thinking a lot about “no failure training” which is a mode that dog trainers use when they are trying to shape a behavior with a dog. They set the bar deliberately low at first, and make it easy for the learner to pick the right choice. They celebrate that as vigorously as if it were hard. When animals are punished for making the wrong choice, they often shut down and avoid the behavior altogether.
The thing is, that we’re mammals and this kind of conditioning works for us too.
As you swing into the final week, I want you to think about how you can celebrate your small successes. You opened the document! Say out loud “good job!” You wrote a sentence. Well done, you. You got part of a scene written. Awesome! Those words didn’t exist before.
I also want you to think about the ways you punish yourself. “I should have written, but I’m a screw-up” or “I totally failed because I lack the self-discipline.”
Science tells us that positive and negative self-talk have direct effects on our emotions and our abilities. Victory does not need to be large to be a victory. Success does not mean hitting a goal. It means feeling satisfied with your efforts.
So, I’m here to tell you that no matter how close you got to your goal, you succeeded, because you wrote words or thought of scenes that didn’t exist before. Celebrate that. Encourage yourself to feel each small success, because that will help you be more eager and excited the next time you sit down to write.
Who’s a good writer? Is it you? It IS! Good job!
Yours,
Mary Robinette
Mary Robinette Kowal is the author of The Spare Man, Ghost Talkers, The Glamourist Histories series, the Lady Astronaut Universe, and Molly on the Moon. She is part of the award-winning podcast Writing Excuses and a four-time Hugo Award winner. Her short fiction appears in Uncanny, Tor.com, and Asimov’s. Mary Robinette, a professional puppeteer, lives in Denver.